Birth of a Mother

I hang up the phone as I swing my feet onto the floor from my bed. I’m immediately wide awake, looking out the window into the darkness of the sky and the twinkle of the stars. I check the time ;  2:32 AM. I go to my closet and open it up, taking out a long black dress and I slide it over my head, grab my scarf and walk out to the living room. I pause for a moment in front of the large windows and take a breath. My entire body is vibrating with a mix of excitement and calm all at once. My bags are already in the trunk of my car as I begin my drive to to the birth of a mother-

As a midwife this scene has played out hundreds of times for me…Some mothers gave birth in a candle lit living room and some in a brightly lit hospital. I’ve witnessed the unfolding process of the scary unexpected pregnancy to the joyful expected ones; I’ve walked alongside the easy pregnancy’s and the really hard ones; the births where baby slid out like they were well oiled and the ones that took 3 hours of pushing; the babes that came 12 weeks too early and the ones where the squeeze was too much and came through a well place incision in their mothers abdomen; I’ve seen mothers pass their newborns into the arms of a teary eyed adoptive mother and I’ve seen the sadness of the mother that has passed her newborn baby to a social worker, never to see their baby again.

For those of you that are mothers, each of your paths have been unique. For those who are not mothers, you still share the same creation story…All of our beginnings were in the warmth and safety of a mothers womb.

Once we come earthside our relationships with our mothers take root. Perhaps it’s a relationship of love and laughter…perhaps it is one of estrangement and bitterness…perhaps there is a void from the mother that we’ve never met. Relationships can be so complicated and yet so beautiful.

This Mother’s Day, I encourage you to take a moment when you first wake up, and to look out your window and up to the sky. Take a deep breath in and as you exhale…Envision your mother…Imagine her face…Imagine her smile…Imagine that perfect space of safety you had in her womb…And honor that. Connect to the deeper understanding that is bigger than the concept of love or hate. Connect, if only for a moment, to the love of your mother. Honor that she, just like you, has a story and a life full of love and pain…and somewhere in that story she nurtured you in her womb and brought you earthside to smile up at the sky and breath in deep gulps of fresh air and to give you the opportunity to feel… I AM ALIVE! I AM HERE IN THIS MOMENT! I AM GRATEFUL FOR MY LIFE!

Thank you mother. Thank you to all the mothers of the world. - Tinneca